Oh dear. I just had to try
this after reading the hillarious things other people came up with.
Purple LoveViggo finished packing. Ever since Orlando, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Viggo had been tender.
There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing watched him, all was rough. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going wrapped in a blanket to become a tingling aubergine.
Just then, there was a soft knock at the door. Viggo opened it and stood there deeply for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his lip.
When Viggo came to, Orlando was holding his thumb and looking orange. "My love," Orlando said intensely, "I'm sorry for the melting shock. I've been shipwrecked on a glowing island for the last ten years, living bathed in the golden glow from his eyes.. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my eyelid in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Viggo could hardly believe his Orlando had returned. "I will always love you, eyelid or no eyelid. Besides, you can cover it up with your boxers."
They embraced softly and vowed to never be parted again.
And all was aching.